I was driving home from work and contemplating how I was going to kick off my totally awesome birth weekstravaganza when it dawned upon me that my boyfriend didn't care about me so I droped that dick the same night. The next morning, I was overwhelmed with endless possibilities and excitement. I was finally free of that asshole and I was looking to get under a new one.I have the habbit of wanting to fuck the best of the worst so it wasn't hard to figure it out.
The People's Joy Parade was my inevitable destination. I was totes feeling some girl time with one of the most rad babes I know and excitement was high. After grabbing some Stag for my backpack, we headed towards inebriation with hearts filled with joy and determination to have a great fucking time. Beer, whiskey, mojitos, and a Pina Colada in a cored out pineapple later, I was fucking sloshed! That is when I stumbled into a penis I was curious about(dude was a total dick but I like to figure these things out for myself). Drunken hookups ensued for the next couple of weeks and I had to wonder if there was something in the water at that house(second guy I hooked up with in that same house and the dicks ran big). The first indication of the dude's dickatude was during a not so hot sexting session. I am an aweful sexter, but I thought that I should give it a try. In an attempt to be comedic, I texted a photo of my condom drawer(yes, I have a drawer full of fucking ccondoms. I'm no baby's mama!) complete with the lube I had recently purchased. That is when it happened..... I receive a question that made me seriously question who I was chosing to surround myself with. "Is your vag dry?" No, my vag is not fucking dry, but it's no longer wet for you! I stopped giving a fuckand started to hook up with nicer dudes. I love being twenty nine. I wonder what I'll be like at thirty?
